Can't Touch This

For the majority of the time I've been trying to get divorced, I haven't had a whole lot of social interaction. Sure, I was in school for the first few months of it, but I was super depressed and hardly talked to anyone in any of my classes. Then summer came and the only time I got out of the house was to work at a pre-school. The only people I talked to were four-year-olds and catty women.

When I went back to school to work on getting my teaching credential about a month and a half ago, I had pretty much gotten over most of the depression and I was just fed up with the complications of the divorce process. Over the last month and a half, I have been looked at, talked to, and even hit on by more guys than I think I ever have before. I'm pretty positive that this is directly related to the fact that I'm technically single, which means there's no one to get upset if they do some flirting, but also technically married and, therefore, am free of the pressure of the possibility of a relationship. Simply put, guys want me because they can't have me.

I don't mean to sound conceited because I'm talking about guys wanting me. I know it's not me they want. It's the fun, flirty, risk-free interaction. To be honest, I don't mind. It's fun for me, too. It gives me the illusion of being wanted without having to deal with the fear that I'll get myself into another terrible relationship. I don't know how much, or even if, I'm interested in most of these guys. The great thing is; it doesn't matter. Once my divorce is finally over, I'll be available, which will completely take away my appeal. All my "suitors" will vanish.